G8 Aquila aka It's G8 to be a head of state and not give a fuck(How to invent new tourism)

Aquila, 2009.Everyone's been toured around the city, damage report included.All that bollocks.

Different questions asked about where the kids are , how much will it take and cost to build it up again, funds tat'd be given to the city.All that bollocks.

Press is around so you have to ask something deep and make a serious/sad/thoughtfull grin as you look at the demolished city.All that bollocks.

The head of state's wives doing a separate tour, trying to sound involved too, but looking more like a fashion walk-about, based on the clothes they wear and their overral look.Meanwhile, the people rescued from the earthquake, that these important presidents are asking about and supposedly caring for, are still living in tents. Frankly nobody knows where they are and if they really exist. They're treated like an extinct species, they'll still gonna disappear eventually, so why bother.Handshakes, smiles towards the cameras, paper pose.''We salute the people of Aquila!''That's just bollocks.

Main conference/congress(or whatever fancy term they use nowadays)room. All gathered at the table. Nice cutlery, crystal glasses, expensive wine, all standing in front of each head of state, delegate, translator.
There's a world recession going on, yet the ''virus'' has yet to pass the bodyguards at the entrance and make its way into topics, minds or even vestimentary items.
-What are we gonna do to stop the famine in Africa and help the poor? an undisclosed voice started the talks.Silence in the room at first.
-Who was that? someone askedMurmuring in the hall.
-Famine? Poor people? I didn't come all the way from Washington DC, and that stands for Da Capital, to discuss these things! said Barack Hussein Obama. Where's my fried chicken wings, by the way? I asked for some fried chicken, with some corn. Why haven't those arrived? Now that's what I wanna talk about.
-End I want zome pickles. Angela Merkel continued
-If that's how you pray, I want my Cantonese lice. said the Chinese president
-By the way I loved how you smacked the shit out of those islamic bastardsin Urum-whatever the hell it's named. It's our duty to kill, banish and force to abandon all these muslims all over the world. Squash them like I did with that fly!
Laughs in the hall.
-I'm a muslim myself but I couldn't care less. I can become the new Hitler, he was chasing after his own. Next thing, I might even join the Klan. Could be fun. Obama continued
The whole room was laughing.
-Good joke, Mr President, Obama's translator whispered to his ear.
-So what else are we gonna discuss then, if not the poor and the necessity to give them a future? The recession, the crazy-going climate, endangered species.....the same voice was heard
-Someone get this Bono out of here!! Berlusconi yelled. I've got too many underage girls and Sardinian villas to think about already.
-The endangered species is somewhat an appealing subject to me. Gordon Brown joined the chattin'. I can barely get a decent fish'n'chips in the Uk, now that's an endangered species. Good fast-food.
-I agree! Obama said
-You're perfectly right! Merkel agreed
-I have to go to Singapole to get a nice lice. In China everybody not work, they all watch Jet Ri movies. The Chinese president broaded the spectrum of the discussion.
-What about pizzas? Berlusconi asked. Don't you think we should decide here and now the future of it? I think it's mandatory.
-Yeah!! the room ''choir'' agreed.
-All this food talking is really making me hungry. said Obama
It didn't take more than ten minutes till the head of states were feasting in the supposedly G8 aka very important meeting aka talking bout important stuff aka ''we'll help the world''.
By the time they ended their lunch-dinner, the day agenda regarding agreements was done.
-All we need now is a nice movie and we can call it a succesful day, said Brown.
-I'm a big fan ov Robert Rodriguez, that's why I'fe brought wis me Vrom dusk till dawn, said the French president.
-Where's Carla, Nicholas? Merkel asked
-She's out shopping.
-Shopping? Where? There's no store left intact in ze city....
-She had herself built a shopping mall just outside the city....
-Ah, gutt.
They went on with the movie.At the end of it, Merkel, stretching on the luxury armchairs broke the silence.
-I'd really like to meet George Clooney.
-You're in luck Angela, he's in town.
-Really!?
George ''You've no better smile than mine'' Clooney entered the hall, greeted everyone, handshakes, kisses, congratulations, all that bollocks.
-So, what brings you into town? Berlusconi asked
-As most of you know I've been in a slight cone of shadow lately...-Lately, make it more like 3-4 years.....
The room laughed.
-The Italian press, just like the rest of the world, doesn't care anymore about what I say, think or do...
-Yeah, but you do none of those...
Everyone was laughing still.
-I can't remember the last time they've even put me on the front cover of a magazine. It's a shame, really, for an actor like me. So I invented the poor and not-gonna-happen excuse of a movie I'll make in Aquila. Besides there's free food here and they do one hell of lamb round these parts.
Everybody nodded.
A young gypsy girl appeared next to Clooney, looking at him, waiting for some spare change.
-Get out of here, go to Angelina Jolie, she'll fucking adopt you, turn you into a brat, goddamit!
And those were the last words for the G8 talks held in Aquila, before the head of states and all other ''important'' people went clubbing and shit. They must have......


Seeying all these people coming to visit Aquila after such a devastating earthquake leads me to the idea that a new type of tourism has been created.The bigger the damage, the better aka more people will visit. Thus, hail the earthqukes, hail the volcano eruptions, hail the train accidents and nuclear bombings, hail the massive flooding and extreme drought. If any of these, and others, happen in your countries, cities, whatnot, don't despair......You'll meet lots of famous(even though most of us don't really know why they're famous for) persons, you'll be talked about, you'll be photographed while scrapping for food, or while trying to shower with no water cause you've no home anymore. But don't cry, don't feel sorry, don't feel helpless.....Tourists will come look at deserted streets and torn buildings. The new wave of tourism has started, it seems it's quite hip.........T.